I met Lucia Leandro

Never Done: Met Lucia Leandro

At a home-cooked, sit-down, birthday dinner party for 18. That Nina cooked. And Donna and Erica hosted. And Ariel and Lucia Leandro decorated. And Mickey supported in more ways than I actually know. And which was wonderful.

It had been a long time coming for me to meet Lucia Leandro, whom I had heard about for a long time, and had even seen on PieTube, which was Mich's and my nickname for the web stream of Pieathon, which I wrote about last November. Lucia Leandro was one of Nina's support team, and we were introduced by Ariel and Rachel, and I could see them all on the video stream, so I knew what Lucia Leandro looks like, but to them, I was just a chat session. So when I walked into the sit-down dinner party for 18 space, and looked around the room, and said hi to my friends, and then spotted Lucia Leandro, I knew just who he was, but he didn't know who I was. I love those moments -- on the brink of new connection. Anything could happen. And then ... it does.

So I told him who I was, and we started to gab, and I don't know how this happened so quickly, but we started talking about how at his old workplace, on lunch break during the World Cup, he and his co-workers would take the soccer player cards and categorize them by hotness. And then they would sub-categorize them by who looks like Jesus. Of course I loved this, and it led me to ask him where he used to work, which turned out to be the Arcus Foundation, which is, according to Lucia Leandro, and taken (by me) directly from their website, "a leading global foundation advancing pressing social justice and conservation issues. Specifically, Arcus works to advance LGBT equality, as well as to conserve and protect the great apes."

I know a foundation created by a sole individual with wealth when I see one. I didn't work in development for nothing. There's some guy, and I am guessing it's a guy, who has a lot of money, and he is probably gay, and he cares a lot about the protection of the great apes. And he starts a foundation to support both of his passions. His friends love him and make fun of him. His staff has to figure out how to promote the dual mission without offending anyone. And everyone is slightly uncomfortable almost all of the time. I don't know how to describe my brain activity when he told me about the foundation other to say it was akin to watching someone else's life flash before my eyes. I just got it, but also, I was having a visceral experience that I couldn't immediately place. Until I could.

I was sitting with Jesse in the Longacre Theater in 2004, watching a Broadway production of a play by Mark Medoff, called Prymate -- about scientific experimentation, human-animal relationships, HIV/AIDS, hearing loss/deafness, and sexual aggression. More specifically, it's about the relationship between a gorilla who has been the subject of scientific experimentation, and a deaf-mute linguist who works with autistic children. But I'm skirting around the real issues. In the production, the scientist was played by a blond actress, and the gorilla was played by an gay, African-American actor. And the play was ridiculous.

Casting a black man to play a gorilla on Broadway is bold. I'll tell you what's even more bold; the actor (Andre De Shields) played the role with brilliant physicality and stunning emotional commitment. So while on the one hand, the play had me squirming in my seat, on the other hand, the performance had me riveted. I don't think I'll ever forget the feeling of sitting in that theater, mouth agape, unable to reconcile the conflicted thoughts and feelings pulsing through my brain and body.

And what a delight to meet someone with whom I can talk and laugh about Prymate, seven years later. I have a feeling that Lucia Leandro and I will always have a special bond.

Pieathon

Never Done: Pieathon

My friend Nina Calloway just baked pies for 24 hours straight, to raise money for CancerCare. Both her parents died of cancer (as did mine) and she decided to honor them in this wonderful, creative way.

Actually, I think she baked for longer than 24 hours. She had a team of support people to help her stay focused and fed, and to help her stay in touch with the outside world, but she otherwise innovated and executed this amazing feat on her own. So why am I claiming it as a Never Done activity of my own? Because Nina was thoughtful enough to make the Pieathon interactive and participatory.

I sponsored Nina by buying a Sugar Cream pie. (I had to choose Sugar Cream, because it's the flavor I had never had before!) And then, to my delight, Nina web cast the entire bake-o-rama on UStream, and so I got to watch the action from the comfort of my own living room, and I also got to write in and interact with her and her support team and other viewers over the 24 hours. (At some point, I named the station PieTV, and then Mich named it even better: PieTube.) In a few minutes I am going over to her apartment to pick up my Sugar Cream pie, which I'll be sharing it with friends on Thanksgiving Day.

Did you catch that? One Pieathon. All that community building. I even met two people during the webcast. True, they couldn't see me (only the words I was typing) but I could see them, so when we are eventually in a room together, I will recognize them, introduce myself to them, and we will have a point of connection.

One of the 613 mitzves (mitzvot) is to respect your father and mother. Thank you Nina, for respecting yours so bountifully, and allowing us to join you. Zikhroyne livrokhe. May their memories be a blessing.